Make haste slowly

April 18, 2008

Uncontrolled thoughts

Filed under: family,thoughts/rants — dbcalo @ 2:07 am

I awoke sitting there with a stuffy head. Attempting to breathe but to no avail and as a stumbled to the bathroom to ready myself for what I knew I needed, I began to think about Mike. I truly expect him to start messaging me one day down the line as I cannot perceive a world in which he does not exist. Unfortunately I live in that world and it exist without my imagination allowing it. In the ebb an flow of our consciousness I often wondered if there was any direct interaction our imagination had with the way things are, were, or should be, but now I know the specific answer. I don’t like that answer but I’m going to have to get used to it, reorganize my life, and forge a new existence in it; without my friend.

There are no more Mike’s. His presence will never be with us again. This is what I dread because knowing this scars my soul. It was so sudden, abrupt, violent, and has thrown chaos into our lives.

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